It is exactly a week since my mom passed away.
As we were given enough (maybe) time to prepare, as I have a feeling that I did whatever I could do for her, as she hadn't had too much pain while hospitalized, as 85 years of life isn't too short...
So many logical reasons for me to accept the fact, but...
I have some difficulty putting into English words (even in Japanese, too) what is on my mind now.
A mixed feeling of sorrow, loneliness and relief?
It may take some time to face the feeling and get over it.
At the very last moment of the funeral, just before putting the lid of the coffin, I said to her, "Thank you and good-by, mom. We surely meet again some time and somewhere in another world, maybe you will be my daughter next time?" She looked as if she was smiling to me.